Tomorrow Tomorrow

Okay so there is this song in a musical called Tomorrow and in it there is a line that goes tomorrow tomorrow I love ya tomorrow its only a day away. Well this is how I feel now. Brent gets home tomorrow and I am thirilled and excited and all sorts of other things that I am not able to express about this. So as my finals words tonight I will post some more of the lyrics from the script of our dear orphan annie.

The sun'll come out
Tomorrow
Bet your bottom dollar
That tomorrow
There'll be sun!

Just thinkin' about
Tomorrow
Clears away the cobwebs,
And the sorrow
'Til there's none!

When I'm stuck a day
That's gray,
And lonely,
I just stick out my chin
And Grin,
And Say,
Oh!

The sun'll come out
Tomorrow
So ya gotta hang on
'Til tomorrow
Come what may
Tomorrow! Tomorrow!
I love ya Tomorrow!
You're always
A day
A way!

Mexico 2008

Okay so I just recently returned from a trip that truely caused me to check my life again. This year we went to Mexico to build houses and teach valuable skills to the members in Tijuana. This trip always causes you to reflect and think and be humbled and think about all sorts of things that are in your life that make you "happy" and you can go to Mexico and see how happy these people are without the things that we have. I cannot even explain to you in words how I felt. This is probably due to many things the first of these being that everybody has a different experince and that there are not wors out there to desribe the feelings that we felt. The evaluation of what happen is easy to do however and that is what I am going to do. I am going to give a day by day summary of what happened while we down there(including inside jokes and stuff like that so bear with me if it doesn't make too much sense)

Day 1: Friday November 21st 2008
We meet at my parents house to head to Primm Nevada for the evening. But prior to this I was sent on some errands and I forgot a bunch of stuff of course in me style. So I was teased about for a good chunck of the way down there. My sister tried to do a rubiks cube with a little bit of help from our twin neighbors. We had some great fun cracking jokes about each other over the two way radios. We drove into Cedar City and picked up our last passenger and stopped for a bite to eat at the group favorite Panda Express. Then after dinner we drove into Primm Nevada the rest of the way about three hours. When we got to Primm we dealt with the most frustrating hotel desk staff that you could ever imagine working with. I do not think they had a clue what was happening. We waited no lie for a good 45 minutes to have a room key with a very short line only the six cars that drove down with us. It is obvious that they do not make their money from the amazing customer service but from the casinos. Whatever I finally got to my room and I was thrilled to fall asleep then I remembered that I had to wait up for my bed buddy so I watched October Sky on USA and remembered how much I like that movie so I finished and then went to bed a while after Ashley had arrived.

Day 2: Saturday November 22nd 2008
Okay so we set the goal to be up and ready to leave at 8 AM the good news is that we left at 8:30 so we did very well. Then we go a caravaning away and into the great state of California. We do california only stopping in San Diego and a Chevron with a Subway for lunch prior to crossing the border into Mexico and not being sure about the quality or cleanliness of the food we are eating. So we (the cars without trailers) alll get together in Sunny D and head off to Florido Mexico and Cucapah. Well we had no trailers so no problem crossing. Those with trailers on the other hand had to stop to avoid what happened to us two years ago being almost being deported or arrested. So they did it the right way and paid all of the taxes and all of that. We on the other hand were to drive straight to the stake center. Well we got lost and ended up needing an extra half hour or so to get there. We got there with the help of the missionaries which we fortunate to have found and they gave us directions to the nearby church and there we got the neccesary help to get us back to the right place. So we ended up pulling into the church the same time as those with trailers did. Which was my parents car and boy were we glad to see that stake center which is like a refuge from the world in an area of filth. We spent saturday night setting up and getting ready for the week which was very eventful.

Day 3: Sunday November 23rd 2008
This is a long day for not working. Okay so before I left I volunteered to sing in a quartet and I was really excited about it and then they changed it to a group and I was like cool and then they are like you are going to sing in Spanish instead and I was like, "umm, I do not speak spanish so I obviously do not sing in spanish." They were like we do not care so I sang a small group part in How Firm a Foundation. For some reason I had a difficult time holding back the tears while singing this song even though I did not speak in the language I was singing in. I felt the spirit communicate to me soo strongly that I just knew the church was true everywhere and that is what I am reminded of every year when we go and sing in Sacrament Meeting. The gospel is true in every language and in every country. We did the singing thing twice and then a bunch of us headed to the cultural hall to eat lunch and just relax. Well we ate lunch and then the job bosses headed off to survey what was ahead of them for the week. Then we played games and slept and stuff like that cause hello we had to be up fairly early so that we could move all of our beds and stuff like that. Then we did a fireside later in the evening where I got to play with the primary kids and help them make a craft and color pictures and sing primary songs in English and Spanish. Then we finally had our nightly meeting and got to go to bed and it was wonderful until one of our roomies started to snore pretty badly. But I was tired enough it did not matter.

Day 4: Monday November 24th 2008
Okay so this day I got a little bit sickish and it was suggested that I do not go on the job so it is me and a bunch of older ladies staying home and sorting A TON of fabric. But we did a lot of stuff and sorted out the fabric, toys, sewing machines, and clothing. I still did a lot of good but I would have rather been out on a job. But that evening when those went on the job got back and I realized how much they had done that day they even got to the insulation. I was amazed and realized that they can still do it all without me there. I was super happy for them but kinda sad cause that is my favorite thing to do. If it wasn't I would not have gone obviously. But that night we quited some stuff and had our first evening of real Mexican Food in the words of Britney Jones, "Soo GUUUD" Then we went to bed and the snoring finally kept me and Katie from sleeping so we hauled a comforter and our blankets into the hallway in the church and crashed out there.

Day 5: Tuesday November 25th 2008
This day I finally got to work on the job. This was the day that we go to do all of the exciting things that I missed out on the day before while sorting through the ton of fabric scraps. Well this day I got to do all sorts of things that I had never been allowed to do before. This day I got build and install a wall. Yeah I did. I used the anchoring gun and nail gun and got it all in place like it should have been. I also got to assemble some bunkbeds and install them. I built shelves and wired a home. I even attached the outlet to the wiring and switches. I helped do a little bit of plumbing and insulation also that day. I later came home and helped a large number of sisters learn to quilt and sew. The ones that I had enjoyed teaching the most were these three young women two laurels and a beehive. Two of these girls were the daughters of the relieif society president and they learned and worked so quickly. What was even better was that they helped us to accomplish what we were hoping to accomplish and that was teach a few who could then turn around and teach some others. This is what these Young Women did. They were able to teach some of the older sisters and other young women how to quilt and sew and all of that stuff. Although I hated the amount of noise and the choas I really did love how well recieved and worthwhile this activity was.

Day 6: Wedensday November 26th 2008
Okay so it rained and rained and rained this day. So instead of going to a project were I wass not neccesarilly needed too much I stayed back and helped to quilt. Or if you are Bradley we chose to "quilt". Well this day we probably tied and finished fifty quilts. Becuase this night was chosen as a continuation of the previous nights activity we had to get it ready to go and closer to be being done and that is what we did. We tied enough quilts that the sisters could get them done that evening or at least so that there would be a bigger percentage fo them done. We then worked on getting the other humanitarian projects together for that evening. Once we got everything ready I started to do other stuff. As the quilting was drawing to a close I decided I should probably head outside and take a shower. Well I had forgotten my flip-flops at home and to avoid being seen in my towel and swimming suit by the members there that evening I chose to change outside. Well I left my clothes on a chair right outside the shower tarp opening. Well I hopped in the shower in only slightly cloudy weather and hopped out in a full on rainstorm. Well I got out of the shower and discovered that my clothes had become completely soaked and I had already taken off my swimming suit and there was no way that I was going to try to pull on a soaking wet suit so I wrap up in my towel and run back inside to get dry clothes. Well as I am running I discover that the tile outside of the building is a bit slippery fortunately I did not slip or else I would have run into some serious problems exposing my naked glory to all those members inside the church. That was Wedensday.

Day 7: Thursday Novemeber 27th 2008 Thanksgiving Day
Okay so it rained again and I yet again made the decision to stay home and work on finishing quilts. The men however went and framed up our other project which is a salon addition on a home. They got up two walls and started to paper and insulate them. This is fantastic. This day however we did not have sisters coming to help us that evening with the quilting. I hand basted a lot of batting in. I tied and pinned quilts on frames. I even stiched one shut. This day was a long one also full of quilting and other stuff. Along with the quilting I got to play a few games with the other ones that stayed back. We played a fun game called the name game. I will have to teach some people how it goes sometime. But we played it and my brother cheated and then I worked on more quilting and cleaning up cause I knew we had to leave the next day. So I spent the day cleaning up and packing up and all of that good stuff. So I quilted, cleaned, and packed. Well that evening the ward members surprised with a delicious Thanksgiving dinner including four different types of turkey and Mexican Mashed Potatoes. It was SOO GOOUD!! Then I played run away from the light with little Karlita, the relief society presidents daughter. She is adorable. Then we had our final meeting and to tell you the truth it was quite disappointing as always to leave but it still felt so good to know what we did.

Day 8: Friday November 28th 2008 Black Friday
Okay so this morning we sent our powerhouse men out really early to finish the salon with roof and walls. Then we all got together and headed to see the projects done and dedicate the homes that we built. This is always a super spiritual experience and I am soo glad for it even though I did not understand what was said in the prayers I do understand that Heavenly Father is pleased with our work and I am so thankful for that. Then we said our final goodbyes to the Roja's and Christian and packed up and headed for the border. This is where the story become very interesting. My car was the second car through. My parents who had been right there with us the whole time were about 45 minutes behind us in the end of it all. Drug Smuggling is a big issue in Tijuana and I think that the US Border Patrol thinks that my dad is a drug smuggler. Whatever. Well we eventually all get rendevoused together again and we are playing another game called Hiyah or chopp you. I am not sure actually. So we play this until my parents get there. Then we head on our merry way into Barstow California where we enjoy our first annual tradition of Tommy's Burger. Then from their we head into Primm Nevada where we enjoy our second tradition of riding the Desperado at Buffalo Bills. Then we head off to bed. My beddine had food poisoning poor thing. Not from Tommy's but most likely leftover food in Mexico, she did not caravan with us so she did not eat there I am fairly sure. Then nighty night.

Day 9 Saturday November 29th 2008
Okay so we woke up ate at the buffet. Not too good either. Then we loaded up and drove home. The whole while I was texting and working on putting together a temple trip that I was in charge of. I am glad that I have good friends that were willing to help me. I got it all put together and showed up to the temple about 15 minutes behind my ward. We made it home from Primm in great time. We left there at about 11:30 Utah time and I was heading to the temple by 5:35 Utah time. That is proof that my prayers are answered. I had an enjoyable evening followed by a long, deep, good, nights sleep in my bed.

That was the trip I will post pictures eventually.

sTuPiD tHiNgS

Okay so we have all heard the common adage that stupid is as Stupid does. Well over the past few days I felt like I have been bombarded with an overly high amount of stupid. Here are some of the things that I have witnessed.

1. Well I am waiting for a missionary as many of you know. Well during this waiting I am daily confronted with overwhelming amounts of stupidity from all around me. I always get stupid questions and comments directed at me. The best of which usually include reminding me of how long two years is and that I am going to get bored. Another favorite I get is why wait when you can get what you want right now. That is just ridiculous I do not want that I want BRent and that is why I think waiter haters are like stupid is and for sure like stupid does.
2. Favorite Stupid Quote of the Right Now: "My Second Cousin's dogs mother's, sister's, missionary relationship didn't work out, so don't get your hopes up." Said to a girl by a family member about why she shouldn't wait.
3. Favorite Stupid Pick Up line as of Now: "I see that you have a firm testimony and a nice set of Scriptures" What does that mean? Please somebody tell me!!!

Stupid is as Stupid does,

Jordo

Rainstorms and a good friend

Okay so this may or may not upset some people but what other choice do I have. So I walk to Ward Prayer no matter how far usually. I like to walk and some nights I even need to walk to get over some stuff that I am dealing with at the time. Well tonight was one of those nights. I decided to walk to ward prayer and that is where it all began.

I was having a conversation with my mom previously to this walk and was still a little bit frustrated by the whole thing and that it just wasn't fair and I was upset so I walked. While walking I started thinking about this conversation I had just had with my mom and I started to analyze what was happening and I had realized that I was maybe being a little selfish but then I started to justify it and then I tried to talk myself out of it and now I am in a trap of not knowing what to do. I am not sure if I was right to feel upset and offended that this was ruining my plans and that I still want to do this with my family and that it is not fair to split my family onto a million different projects. I am now just upset cause I can't have what I want in this trip it has already been altered despite my choice in a way I wish it hadn't been and now adding this to it. I just feel that we are overly accommodating for this other family and that I am being deprived of the experience that I want. Why must I feel that I am being shortchanged in this whole thing. I know that my attitude is not all Christlike and this is what is bothering me so much. I just can't help but look forward to the whole week that we get to spend together when we get down there. I love that we get to do so much and that we can learn so much about each other but I also really like looking forward to the experience of getting reacquainted with my family and that stuff. I love the close knit relationship that we develop over this weak long period. This reason is why I am so upset that this may be happening. It is not so much that I care about the projects as it is that I care about the bonding and growing and service opportunities with my family.
I am being selfish about the opportunities out there but I am also already sacrificing so much to go. The other family is being selfish too and it got me even more upset when my mom was all like you are acting just like her(the mom in the other family) and I was like you know what me it is not about the projects it is about the bonding and growing and serving. I know I am not acting very Christlike right now and I need your prayers to help me get over this and deal with the possibility that I may hate every minute of this trip but will still have a good attitude and do everything that I need to do while I am down there and somehow bless the lives of others and maybe even bless my life as well.
This is were I cry and struggle getting through stuff because I know that I am wrong for feeling this way and then I feel worse for feeling so bad about it. I am such a horrible person cause I feel this way.

So after ward prayer I am leaving and I of course choose to walk due to the events stated above. Well as I was walking out of ward prayer I run into a girl who I know quite well and I was mildly surprised that she was willing to talk so we started to talk and I was just expressing my concerns and feelings to her and she reminded me of the plan in everything. But she did not help on one major point cause she said that I was not being selfish by being wanting to go down there to get closer to my family and to work side by side with them.

I need input and advice was I or was I not being selfish??

Is selfishness about family a not so Christlike attribute even though it is after all family??

Am I really as bad as I make myself seem??



I am now going to cry some more okay??

As confused as always,
Jordo

The verdict

Okay so I have made a decison about DC. Here it goes. I am going to go to DC for the next 24 hours and if I get any sort of negative feelings about it or I start to feel at dispeace I will change my mind and see what happens. I know that both decisions are good and that I will be happy to make the right one. I also know that Heavenly Father will direct me in a way that is correct and good. So for now and the next 24 hours I am going to DC and not looking back but I will still make some phone calls home and stuff

Things that I have decided about...

Okay so I have not yet made a decision about whether I am going to go to DC or stay here with the love of my life. I have started to make a pro/con list in my head but I can only get so far doing that and then it goes to what is not a good choice for my life. I am not person who is known for making the best decisions for myself. Example to prove this is my Sr.Year in High School. But back to what is happening right now. The only slight improvement that I have made is that I have bought a proffesional almost congressional suit. Is that a sign that I am leaning towards this decision more than staying home with BRent.

I was so excited for the opportunity to go to Washington DC and then I got it and now I am scared. I do not know what I am going to do about it now that I have it.

I am just going to give you all update about what is going down in my life.

To be or not to be that is the question

Okay so this post has nothing to do with Hamlet or even Shakespeare. This post is strictly intended to inform you all of the decision that I am going to be making sooner than later. As many of you know I was offered a position as an intern on Senator Harry Reid's staff. This postion would be highly beneficial to me in my future and in my major. I also really love Washington. But the problem is that I would be leaving shortly after, like one week, after BRent gets home. That is the conflict that I am having within myself. I do not what I am to do anymore.

Then I go to ask a friend for her advice and all she can say is does the Bishop know that you are considering leaving. And I kept telling her that I have not because I have not given a definite answer yet. She is like you need to and then low and behold he shows up behind me. Then I am like okay I get no other decision than to tell you so I am like I am most likely going to Washington DC. This dear friend of mine just doesn't understand that I do not go to people that are wiser than me and tell them what I am thinking. I go to wiser and people and tell them what is going to happen or what I am going to do.

Oh well that is just a sidenote of the story. Back to the story. BRent gets home December 30th in case you had forgotten and I would be responsible to report to Washington DC on January 7th and that would give us less than a week together plus I would miss his homecoming talk. I am so torn between two very good decisions. Another thing that adds difficulty to this is that I am really bad at discerning the spirit and I am afraid that I will misinterpret it and suddenly realize that I told BRent that I am gone and then have it be a bad decision. I just cannot get over the fact that I may or may not be making the best choice for me. I LOVE BRENT!! I REALLY WANT TO GO TO DC!!! I really want and love both ideas but I am afraid that I cannot make the right decision on my own that is why I am asking you to help me and to give me some advice on what you think I should do.

PLEASE HELP A GIRL OUT!!!

Luv Jordo

Best Song Ever!!!

This is a great MG song and I think that everybody not just MGs should love it!!!

I LOVE BRENT!!!

Okay so as many of you may or may not know I have been having a very difficult week. I am afraid to fall asleep and I am also super stressed and together that just breeds depression and a problem of what to do with myself. Well I am glad that BRent is in tune with the spirit and sent me a letter on a day that I really needed it. So I got it today and I was pretty much the happiest girl on the planet again.
I know that he doesn't want me to send him any packages or anything for his birthday or Christmas but I think I am going to anyway just cause he asked me not to. I am going to send a big ole box and put a candy bar and a singing card in it and then he will not be upset at me for sending him a package but then I won't be going without sending anything. But in the letter I got today I was reassured of his love and I was so excited that I got to hear about how he wanted to join the 24 hour club too.



I absolutely love this boy and you have no idea how hard it will be on me if something doesn't work out between us. But I was also reassured today of the amount of love that he has for me and he is totally encouraging me to go to DC even though I will be a five hour flight away from him. But I think that I will not get any postions thus far I have only been offered a we will let you know in a few weeks when we get back in the office. I know that I love BRent even more cause he is willing to support me in this. Without BRent and his letter today I know I would be sitting on FB looking for advice from MGs on how to make it by one more day. I am so excited for New Years Eve when he gets home. I am hoping that I was also able to convince him to live close to me by saying hey move here and then we can spend more time together.

I love BRent and I am going to post some more stuff later about this.

Outy,
Jordo

What has happened?!?!?

Okay so I have lately been losing sleep cause I am having nightmares and I am afraid to fall asleep. These nightmares have been differing in scariness and feelings caused in me. The first set of these occured a few months ago when I decided to take a hiatus from boys even though BRent told me to date. These dreams have involved anything from us holding hands out in front of us in a position to kiss with hands to our sides but in the grasp of each other and then turning away. This dream was also followed by a series of dreams where we see each other and realize that we are not meant to be even though we never reconnected or anything like that. The third one was really wierd and I haven't had it more than that one time. But it involved me and a rather ridiculous outfit. Then BRent questioning what I was wearing and why and then not getting the ending cause someone decided to call me super early like six AM. (This one I may have decoded I think it means that I BRent and I are not as well matched for eachother as a couple quite a bit like my outfit that I was wearing in my dreams) Other dreams that me and BRent have both been in are about either him dying or us not working out for some reason or another. I keep getting scared to fall asleep cause I am afraid of the nightmares that are bound to follow.I need some extra help someway to get me through this cause I cannot go without sleep for two more months and three days.

If you have an advice or suggestions or anything that you think might help please let me help.

Rhino vs Unicorn

So omce upon a time I was reading my friend's Facebook Status which read, "Deborah is having one of those days when she looks like a unicorn but feels like a rhino." Then I copied that from her and had it that way for a few days in fact.This status started a very long chain of thoughts and things that create the way I feel to the people who read my stauts.
I just had to share this status and why it is so important

A little reason that I am waiting

Waiting for God's Best - UnknownEveryone longs to give themselves completely to someone.To have a deep soul relationship with another, to be lovedthoroughly and exclusively.But to a Christian, God says no.Not until you're satisfiedand fulfilled and content, unreservedly to me alone.I do love you my child, and until you discover that only in Me is your satisfaction to be found,you will not be capable of the perfect humanrelationship that I have planned for you.You will never be united with anotheruntil you are united with Me,exclusive of any other desires or longings.I want you to stop planning, stop wishing, andallow Me to bring it to you.You just keep watching Me,expecting the greatest things.Keep experiencing the satisfaction of knowing that I am.Keep learning and listening to the things I tell you.You must wait.Don't be anxious.Don't worry.Don't look around at the things that others have gotten or that I've given them.Don't look around at the things that you think you want.Just keep looking off and away up to Me, or you'll miss what I want to show you.And when you're ready, I'll surprise you with a lovefar more wonderful than any would ever dream of.You see, until you are readyand until the one I have for you is ready,until you are both satisfiedexclusively with Me and the life I have planned for you,you won't be able to experience the lovethat exemplifies your relationship with Me,and is thus perfect love.I am working even this minute,to have both of you ready at the same time.And dear child, I want you to have the most wonderful love.I want you to see in the flesh apicture of your own relationship with Me,and to enjoy materially and concretely theeverlasting union of beauty and perfection.



So I found this on the W4AM page and had to share it.
This is why I am waiting!!!

New Years Eve and my induction into the 24 Hour Club!!!

Okay so ladies he told his release date and I am thrilled to the moon and back!!! I am still sitting here with a large smile glued to my face and dancing around and uber super happy and delightful and nothing seems to bother me. Man if this is what love really feels like than I want to always be in love. I guess it is true what they say about love being when your reality is finally better than your dreams. I am thinking to myself am I going to be able to deal with this when he gets home and then it hits me it is like almost here. I somehow was really excited that decided to crack and tell me when he is getting home. I also like how it was so nonchalantly just like I am too sad to be leaving this place and I look forward to seeing you soon.


I will be released December 31st. That was it and I loved that little detail about it. S0 if you need me to tell you when he is coming home cause you missed t then here it is December 31st 2008!!! I am so excited that i just do not know what I am going to do with myself!! In fact I made up a little rhyme which totally proves that I am way too giddy for my own good. Here is part of it. Now I cannot remember it but as soon as I do I will write it down somewhere and then I will post it so that you can all share in my giddiness!! 69 Days from now baby!!!

First thing on my list is New Years 24 Hour club induction!!!

Church was Amazing today

Okay so today I was kinda bummed out about life and love and school and other things that are incapable of being pin pointed. Well my day got better somehow. I think it started today with Sacrament Meeting when we talked about how service gives us strength and courage to do whats right even when it seems hard. I also learned that by doing what is right I am creating a trend that I can carry through for the rest of my lfe. Then in sunday school I learned about how I can conquer my trials just like the nephites dis when they battled gidionhi. Then in relief society I knew that my trio of lessons just for me were drawing to an almost perfect ending. This event was only topped by Aaron when he bore his testimony at Ward Prayer about the same things I felt.

Man do I love when things like that happen. Yeah I am still upset but I know that it is okay to just go on and that eventually it will get better.

HELP!!!

Okay this is my call for help readers. I am letting satan influence my life a lot more than I really should but it is worse is that I kinda like how I am feeling by allowing this to happen. At first when I was a straight laced "molly mormon" at work I had no respect, I was teased and ridiculed. Now that I am bending my standards a little bit I am getting some attention and even a little bit of respect as a true asset. The other problem I am having is that I am facing troubles with my friends right now and these friends really make me feel like a really bad person. They are great people and they are so smart and wise and all of that good stuff. The only problem is that I am not that way at all. I am very small and timid and young in my learning of the gospel. They make me feel so insignificant around them. That is why I suddenly have decided that I like to hang out with the work girls even though it is a bad environment and I bending my standards to fit in with them. They do not make me feel so bad about myself or about anything that I do. I love hanging with them but I am fearful that if I hang with for too long I am going to become to much like them and will in turn become less and less of the person that I want to be. I need help on how to either solve this problem or to satisfy the demands of both of my senses.

I love when Prayers are answered unexpectedly

Okay so here it goes. The other day I was having a pity party cause I was treated badly by some of my friends and I choose not to leave so as not to upset them or to cause them to feel bad just because they could see it. Well I wanted them to feel bad but for them wanting to not from guilt whatever. Well I vented about it here and on the MG wall and I found out later that another MG is my visiting teacher and that I now have somebody who I know will listen and will also understand. Another way in which I was blessed was today. I was working and this customer was handing me something so that I could see it to find her the one in her size and I saw her ring. Then I was like that is totally the ring that I want. So of course she went on told me about it and come to find out later she waited for a missionary and here she is ten years and three kids later telling me to stop worrying about all of that crap and to just remember that I love Brent. She was like an answer to my prayers cause I really needed to hear words of comfort from somebody who is a lot further along in the waiting than even me. I love when my prayers are answered through different ways than is expected.

What you are listening to...

Okay so there in case you haven't noticed there is music playing in the background whil reading this. well here is why I thought it would give you all a better understanding of what is happening in my life and why I feel the way I feel.

1. Traveling Soldier by Dixie Chicks, yeah Brent is not actually a soldier but he is a member of Gods Army is that close enough. Seriously I am just like I really like the waiting for letters theme in this letter it just makes me sooo happy.
2. Lucky by Jason Mraz and Colbie Calliat, okay the song that I swear evry MG has on their playlist. It is totally about knowing which souls can connect over a varying area of circumstance. We can somehow connect with each other and know when something is wrong without saying a word to each other. We are just in love like that I guess.
3. I believe in Love by Dixie Chicks, I believe in love it is that simple. Gah do I love that Cowboy and Indian, man that will be a lot of fun when he gets home.
4. There You'll Be by Faith Hill, okay so it is totally a song that talks about how no matter what is happening we will always be there for each other and we will never let each other go, even from our memories, cause that is the type of impact we have had on each others lives.
5. Not a Day Goes By by Lonestar, I cannot go a single day without thinking about Brent and the amazing man of God that he is becoming. I am always thinking about him it seems like. I do not know what I will do once he is home and thinking about him constatly is replaced with him actually being here. I am always thinking about him even if I don't admit it to him all the time.
6. Come Home Soon by SheDaisy, okay so this song is one that has a video that is for soldiers once again but I feel that it applies so well to MGs that I couldn't resist. It also talks about how I go about my normal everyday life and while doing so I cannot help but think about how life will be when he comes home. I hope he is wishing on the same stars and the same everything else. I know I am not alone but I know that I feel very alone and it is hard and I want him here so that I am not alone.
7. Love Story by Taylor Swift, Okay so this pretty much needs me to explain every little part of it that fits into my life. So the beggining it talks about how we were both young and that we were told not to be together. Well I was twelve and Brent was fourteen when we met and then his parents pulled him away and we could not see each other any more. The next part in the song is about how they secretly see each other. Then when we got older we started having a little correspondence between each other and that for the most part it was secret. Then it goes into a part about how their love is difficult and that it is still real. That is me and Brent, people are always telling me that I should not feel this way. Hello that is exactly word for word of my life. "They're trying to tell me how to feel. This love is difficult but its real. Don't be afraid we'll make it out of this mess its a love story baby just say yes."
8. What Hurts the Most by Rascal Flatts, okay so this song is about death and other bad suff but I know that what is hurting so much is the things that I never got to say to Brent before he left cause I was afraid of what was going to happen if I did tell him. I am also feeling a different type of pain than most people because my experience is different than everybody elses, including MGs, I am the only one to explain what is happening. What hurts the most was being so close.

These are the songs take em or leave em for whatever you want to.

My Christmas Wish List

Okay I know that it is a little bit too early to be thinking about this but I just cannot resisit. Besides some of these are really really good. So here it goes and if you by some weird connection could help out with any of these things I would greatly appreciate it.

1. Hands Down joining the 24 Hour Club!!! (This can happen at any point it time not neccesarily just on Christmas) This can happen before, after, pretty much anytime during the Christmas season would be fine.
2. BRENT!!! Actually this should probably be a prerequisite for the first thing on my Christmas list but I knew that my MGs friends would appreciate this so much more. The reason that I want Brent is hello he has been gone for two years. He is supposed to be coming home sometime around Christmas time and I am so excited.
3. Money. I mean come on what type of college student doesn't appreciate a little bit of the green once in a while. Besides this will always be in style and it will never go unused like funny little christmas sweaters.
4. A video camera or my camera to be fixed so that it is usable again take pictures and videos of me and Brent
5. Brent
6. Brent
7. A new Ipod maybe but I would much rather have Brent
8. Brent
9. A new whitish wool coat so that I can be warm in Wyoming with Brent
10. Brent
11. A kiss under the misletoe with Brent
12. Snowing day, so that I can kiss Brent
13. Brent Brent Brent Brent
14. W0rld Peace
15. Brent

I love Brent and why

Okay so it may or may not be a surprise to any of you that I totally love Elder Brent Sorensen of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and I am way excited for him to get home. So there are many reasons that I love him so but here are just a few if I can think of just a few okay okay I will list to my hearts content.

1. The first time we went on a date he was insistant that we had to go after preisthood session of conference even though I knew we would be able to just go betweeen the final saturday and the preisthood and he would be just fine but in normal him style he insisted on going after so that he could ensure that he was on time and so that he could give me all the attention that he felt I deserved. (Isn't he such a good little priesthood holder)
2. He is the type of person that helps you solve problems by doing absolutely nothing but listening to you vent about it for a little while. He is always good as a listening ear and the occasional uh huh or mm hmm or okay or go on or whatever. (I just love his listening skills)
3. He is great with small children. Once upon a time he came with me to a softball game that my sister was playing in and of course being the musical genius that he is he has no athletic ability at all so he simply played around with my little brother. He has this unique and sometimes difficult to describe way of running around with children. I want to say that it is comparable to the Wiggles. He also is really great around his younger siblings especially his youngest sister Christina who has downs syndrome. (How many men are there out there ladies, ones that love little kids no matter how different they are)
4. He is very gentlemanly, about most things, so we went to prom in Wyoming once and it snowed like a mad dog, in APRIL. Well he was super corteous and he dropped me off at the door of course opening it and grabbing my hand so as to escort me into the dance, Cinderella like I think so, and then he opened the door for me and took my coat and all that stuff prior to even parking the car. (He treats me like the daugther of God that he and I both know I am)
5. He didn't move too fast and always respected me when I said no or not today or something to that effect. Once upon a time we were at Lagoon and we were having a great time and he really really wanted to kiss me and I said no. Now do not give me a hard time yet. I had been dating him for over a year and I liked him a lot but, I was absolutely afraid that if I gave in I would be preventing him from going on a mission and I knew a long way back that I never wanted to be the reason that a boy didn't go on a mission. (PS I later found out that I was one of the driving factors about him solidifing his decision to go on a mission, gah I love him!!)
6. He loved me no matter what. I was not the prettiest nor the most popular girl in school. In fact I was one of those girls who is often consodered wierd and shy or different. I was a band geek who had very few if any nameable friends. But he saw a different me, a me that nobody else saw, ever. He was my little reminder that God does love me throughout the worst part of my life and the awful hell that was high school. Brent loved me cause he saw the real me not the bullied shy hidden me but the real breathing me and he loved it. (I have always been a little bit bigger than my classmates and others and he still loved me even though he is a bean pole and like invisible if he turns sideways. GAH I love him!!)
7. He has the same goals and dreams as me, with maybe a slight disagreement about the number of children we want. I want the things that I know Brent would want. Not because I cannot think for myself but because I have the same goals as Brent. We both have the goals of marrying somebody we love more than ourselves in the temple for time and all eternity, having and raising children, living a virteous life, and eventually after all that we do entering the Celestial Kingdom one day. (Together our testimonies are invincable)
8. It helps that he loves music. I mean that is not the biggest thing that I love about him, but it certainly adds to his charm. I actually really love the fact that he can play hymns and other music that helps to bring the spirit in. But he does not just play piano, oh no, he also plays Clarinet, Bass Clarinet and Organ I am pretty sure.(I have always been attracted to a man that can play the piano)
9. He is a worthy man of God. I mean what type of girl does not love to see the glow that surrounds those boys who are just sooo good. That is Brent, he just glows with the light of the truthfulness of the gospel. He is the greatest person that I could ever hope to be with. AND NO GRANDMA I am not settling. I love him and I know that he loves me and that is enough. Just because I am not a person who marries for the wrong reason three times. Sorry back to reality now. I love the fact that Brent just shows that he knows the truth in everything he does. (A missionary is totally that way anyway isn't he I mean they are the carriers of truth and the bearers of testimonies they are the wonderful people that are to bring about a great cause in this work. They totally carry the light of Christ with them all the time. I love my missionary.)
10. He went to the Lord to find my heart. Somewhere in the scriptures, not sure where, it says that a girl should hide her heart with God and that a boy must find God to find her heart. well that is exactly what Brent has done. Brent is the greatest person in the world and he has found God and has learned how to better love me and I in return have found how to better live him from finding God. (this is very important considering that someday I am planning to make a covenant with Brent and my Heavenly Father and this would be difficult to do if I do not know God)

I love MGs

Okay so most of you readers are my MG friends and as MGs we have the responsibility to keep in contact with each other and to know everything about almost everything about each other. Okay so the other day I was dealing with an exceptionally large amount of MG hatred not by me to you girls but from other people to me and to you girls, people that they don't even know, and that was when it hit me. BAM!!! I am going to vent to you about this. So I did and you for some reason were able to get me through this without doubt and in everyway possible. That event is what inspires this post posting. I love Brent and I love you girls for giving me what I am wanting form Brent but cannot have. So here is the post ten things I love about MGs

1. We have our own lingo (Haters, MGs, etc.)


2. There is always at least one other girl on when we need to talk


3. We can be the best of friends without ever meeting eachother in person


4. We do not judge


5. We always comfort and lift


6. We have spontaneously planned get togethers


7. We ALL love our boys


8. We show a great amount of support and strength thereby being an example to the others around us


9. We deal with more bologna from everybody than anybody should ever have to


10. WE ARE JUST FLAT OUT AWESOME and anybody who disagrees can eat a skunk!!!

MGS I <3>

Haters and Self Righteous People Bug me

Okay so in case you missed my last wall post on the MG site I am now officially a hater of haters and I really am extremely offended by the words of one of the members of my ward who I had thought was my friend.
So here is how it went down. I was playing games at this kid in my wards house and we were just talkin and then it gets down to the basics of what is going in my life so of course I talk about Brent I mean how can I stop. So we are talking about it and some self righteous kid is all like I think that all boys need to break up with their girlfriends before they leave. And I was like that is not such a good idea. And then he went all whatever no girl is the exception to the rule so there is no need to justify your way out of it, NO EXCEPTIONS. I firstly wanted to say well there is no rule, secondly I am not clingy and possesive of him, thirdly I have done exactly as he wished which was date other people and lastly I am sick of you indoctrinating me into believing that I am a bad person cause I have done what is right. Well here they go on about how bad of an idea it is to have me waiting around for a missionary cause blah I am a distraction and he should lock his heart and give me a break I am sick of it and after a while coming from all parties surronding me I was feeling quite hurt. So in my normal style after being hurt I kinda shrug and play off a lot of stuff and my friend Rose could totally tell that this was a major thing running through my head and so she is all like you don't have to feel bad and I was like but I choose to. Here is where it gets better. So the other kids whos' house we were crashing at was like well choosing to feel bad about yourself is not taking advantage of the atonement like it should be and I was like *shrug* whatever. And then Rose keeps trying to cheer me up but I don't want to be and then this other kid keeps giving me a super hard time about all sorts of stuff about how I am feeling and I do not want to hear as all of you can very well imagine. Well I wasn't just going to get up and leave cause that would just kinda scream I am totally offended I am leaving now. So I sit through this and deal with it and get on with my life. Eventually I leave and of course I get in my car turn on my Brent music and start driving. As soon as I am away from visibility from the house I start crying and having retortal conversations to myself hoping that it would make a difference in what happened, which of course we know won't happen. Then I finally get home and that is when it hits me that hello I just need to vent to someone who understands. That is why this story is written all over the MG wall and now on my blog.

Tis all for the super lonely, waiter hater and self righteouss lecturer hater

PS Politics were also discussed in this conversation and y'all should be proud of me for not opening my mouth too wide actually not opening my mouth at all. I am so glad I have somewhere to vent about my problems.

Me at my finest

So I am known as an accident prone blonde who loves to have a great time. So this is a post that I will continually update that is filled with the blonde moments I have had, the ones that I have seen others have and the other great things that help define my life.

• So I am a morning person but not just a morning person I am actually happy in the morning. So many a time I have had moments where I get really angry looks from all of the other people in the room. The most notable of these are the ones that occured during early morning rehearsals in band class. the dialouge was in the whole class and it went like this. Mr. Lemen:"Good Morning boys and girls!!" All but me: "Grr I hate you, good morning(not excitedly) no response" Me:"Good Morning Mr. Lemen!!!" Mr.Lemen: "Jordin that is crazy that you like mornings. Just make sure that you marry a morning person" He told me to marry a morning person like everyday and I listened and I discovered that I will never get married since there are are no morning people in this world besides the crazy me.
• I am very accident prone and it makes doing basic things quite difficult and since that it is the case I also beleive in Murphy's Law which I will quickly describe for those of you who are not aware of what it is. It basically states that if anything bad is going to happen it is bound to happen to me. So this has been true in many instances mostly involving anything besides sitting around doing nothing.
• The upside down turtle. My favorite falling postion which involves me falling on my back and struggling to get up. Falling off curbs while playing mini golf with my fam and landing in the flowers at the course and then having my friend see me is one of the best. Or the turtle incident at girly camp which ended pretty much like the flower incident at mini golf with me on my back and struggling very hard to get up. Except for this incident I was carrying a misbalanced pack and was unable to get back up cause I couldn't see what was happening because it was dark. I lied the turtle at girly camp is way better. It is almost as good as the falling in the river and being thrown back into the boat and being stuck in the same position the upside down turtle.
• The effects of the happymorningness. So once upon a time I went to mexico to build houses and they found out that I was a morning person and that I never hit the snooze button. So this one girl was like what are you a 'happy little poptart'. And for some unknown reason that little pseudonym stuck and I became known as the happy little poptart to Elisa Julia and Mr. Miner which is a completly different story. Involving my senior year trip to Washington DC. Julia, Elisa and I were assigned to be roomies and Elisa and Julia are not morning people at all in fact they hate them with a passion. So I get up with the little alarm clock going off and they are like whoa slow down turbo and I am like I can't I am like a happy little poptart in the morning. and then we were talking about it in the elevator down to the lobby and Mr. Miner was in it with us and that is how I became the happylittlepoptart of Orem High School.
• The Key incident(s). So before I got my Sonata I was driving a '95 Camry and it didn't have auto locks and it wouldn't lock from the outside it would from the inside but not the outside. It is crucial that you understand that. It unlocked from both sides but only locked from the inside. Okay so this is why that part was so crucial. I would open the door undo my seatbelt lock the door and then climb out. Frequently(like three times a week I would lock my keys in my ignition) So after about the second time me and my mom got copies of my key made. Well that did very little since I kept doing it. Then we got a key box put under the bumper of my car that worked okay but I always looked awkward when I would get under my car to enter the code to get the key out of the box. Then Mr. Lemen made this brilliant suggestion that I put a sparer key in his office and that was a great suggestion since i would no longer have to shimmy under my car to get the out of the box. So I would show up in Mr. Lemen's office like three times a week and everytime he would just roll his eyes and laugh at me a little and it was all good fun with me.
• The Bed thing. When I lived at home I had a queen sized bed and I would only sleep on half of it and would fall off frequently. I usually didn't fall too hard since my nightstand usually woke me up enough to have me only force myself to hit the ground so it was usually pretty favorable and not all nasty and stuff. Well when I moved out I still fall off my bed but it hurts more since I don't have my nightstand to wake me up. But that is just what happens.
• So last night at FHE was the first time that I was ever on a trampoline. many a person were shocked by that. The reasons I had never been on a trampoline was because when I was younger my mom always told us no and so that no type ideology carried with me through the teenage years and i just never did that. So at FHE last susan was like lets go jump on the tramp and i was like i never had and she was like it isnt hard. I was like okay so i got and started jumping pretty hard and then susan tried to get me to bounce up by stopping and letting me catch her elasticity and I went really high and then I landed on the tramp and fell over because i was not expecting it. later when me and susan got off another bunch of kids got on and they were going reallt high and they bounced one of there own into the springs and she kinda fell off in a rather ridiculous fashion. Later I was talking to another friend about it and we realized that if I had been less scared of the trampoline and had more higher bouncing people that would have been me since I am so absolutely accident prone.
• I have this wierd Idea that cops tend to follow me everywhere. I went to Utah Lake to go boating. Since my dad's shop is near the lake. Like no lie his shop is around the corner from the Lindon Harbour. So to save money on parking we all parked at his shop and we all climbed into the boat and into the back of the truck to take that drive. Well as we turn the corner from my dad's shop we see a Utah County Sheriff truck. So we can all sii what is going to happen from here. So we go and are all like oh shoot what are we going to do from here. Well this cop was nice enough to be all like just go on your way and we will pretend like nothing happened as long as you are careful. I wish all cops would have been like him. He kind of reminds me of the one we had on the fourth. He reminded me nothing of the one I was so pleased to meet on my way to Jackson Hole on a ward activity. That experience was not the most pleasant of all. If I had to deal with that cop I would have been in tears good thing that it was Dave instead of me.
• So once upon a time me and Susan went and Post -It noted Dave's car and the sprinklers turned on while he was still in work and it made the dye in the paper run and left marks on the car. So I drove susan home later and we saw the pink and we were like shoot. Cause at the time we didnt know what happened. Good news though it washed right off.
• SO yesterday I was driving around town and then I went and picked up Christy so that we could go fabric shopping for her bf's sisters baby. So we are driving around as it starts getting late and the sun is setting so I have the visor down in my car. So we get to fabric mill and we get out to choose fabric. So we go in and as we are doing so I flip the visor half way up so that I do not hit my head on it on the way out. REMEMBER THE VISOR IS ONLY HALF WAY UP!!!! So when we get in the car to go home I sit down and hit my head really hard against the visor because I am blonde and that is just what I do.

That is some of the best to date I will for sure post more as I get them the text color is going to change everytime I update the posts that way when you read it you will know what you have and havent already read

Boys are like...

So boys can be put into the following analogies

1. Hot Tubs they are hot, shallow, not too bright, and if you stick around too long or go in too fast you will be burned
2. Lava Lamps not too bright but always fun to look at
3. Computers they are not there when or where you need them
4. Alarm Clocks not pleasant when they go off and will only temporarily shut up

I will post more as I get them. Or you can comment to me

Red Hair

So throughout high school I had a reputation about being the biggest blonde that ever graced the planet. Well I still have the happy morning person happy little poptart blonde personaltiy but I am not blonde. does that make sense.Well lets simplify it for you a little bit. I am now a red head.

If you find this horribly ironic raise your hand.

Most people's hands go up.

Well now that we see how many of you think that this is an unexpected and quite different from the expected hair color I should have. Well I hope that the Four blondes do not disown me because of the lack of blondeness. they have no reason to since only Christy is the only blonde but with a bumch of girls in a clique who knows what may happen. You know what I won't let them I mean how can we have only three Four Blondes. That would just sound really weird and quite out of place and context but go figure. Besides that they kinda need someone like me to keep them in place as far as randomity goes. Wish me the best of luck with the acceptance of four blondes.

For Now

Happy Little Poptart

Happy Morning Person

Jordin